I woke up early this morning and headed off to a fitness boot camp with one of my girlfriends. Oh. My. Gosh. I’m. Already. Sore. They tell you to bring a yoga mat, but I couldn’t find mine so my friend let me borrow an extra one of hers. After I came home and showered, I text Hubster and asked if it were ok with him if I bought myself a yoga mat because they’re around $20 dollars. He text me back with an Oh Em Gee and crazy emoticon face with a note asking “Are you serious? Just buy the mat. You don’t have to ask.”
My husband works very hard and always has and he supports his kids faithfully. We have school picture order forms on the table and I did not bat an eye writing a check to buy them. But when it came down to me and $20, I felt guilty spending the money.
Logically, I realize this is wrong thinking. There are families everywhere living on the husband’s income alone while the wife stays home and handles the home and children. But I have never been that woman. I have worked since I was 12 years old (babysitting, etc.) with full time jobs starting at the age of 16. When I gave birth to my youngest son, I had been working on a wrongful death case for 2 years and trial was set 2 weeks after his delivery. Guess what. I went back to work when he was 2 weeks old because I was the only one who knew the case inside and out. For that matter, I have my own “separate property funds” from a savings account I opened 10 years ago. When my house sold, I put money away and haven’t used it. It’s still there. Yet here I am asking permission for a $20 item.
It was just another reminder for me that whether I realize it or not, I must believe that my worth is based on my own efforts and works.
Guys, we are ALL worth a $20 yoga mat. We are worth so much more than that even.
And on that note, I’m headed to the store to buy a mat 🙂